A positive quote to think about

Seriously think about it

A CrazyYear in Retrospection Part 2

 This is the continuing series of posts regarding my thoughts about the year. For myself before moving on about this year.

May

This month was quiet and was a month where I continued doing the things that made me feel better and recovering from the feelings of anxiety and fear that had been over me for so long. I didn’t realise until recently how pressured I had been whilst living in the previous place with the family. 

Covid hadn’t disrupted me that much as I hadn’t been out much during the winter and early spring. As the weather affects the way cerebral palsy causes issues for me in the season. So I was enjoying a bit of freedom but still limiting the amount I went out because of the pandemic 

June

This month was much the same as before and started looking after myself mentally and physically in some ways that I can. This included and still includes the following:

• Manicure

• Lashes tinted 

• Eyebrows tinted and tidied

• Hair cut

July

Again this was similar to the previous month. So it was relatively calm and the kids were coming to the end of their school year. The thing was the ability to say yes to what the kids wanted rather than say no all the time.

August

This month was the same as July in the sense that I was able to say yes to the kids, myself and my hubby.

 

Final thoughts

There was lots of freedom for me despite the pandemic. So I feel privileged to have been able to do the things I can while there are so many who have lost their jobs or life.

An amazing quote for this day and age

This is another variation of an amazing quote to think about.

The Year in Retrospect Part One

The last year has been another crazy one

Similarly to 2020, 2021 was a bit of a crazy one with the pandemic causing havoc to everyone in some way or another. Too many lives have been changed by this in unimaginable ways.

Businesses have had to change their ways in how they run. However, I’m not here to talk about the way they were changed. But how the pandemic affected me in the last year.

January

We had just come out of one lockdown and managed to move house just before the beginning of the new year. I wrote about this in a couple of posts such as and had been trying to extend my movement because we are in a bigger place. The change although good, on the whole, threw some unexpected challenges my way. These were that although my body liked the extra space it was not used to it. It took me a year for my mind to accept the change in the environment. As my body had been in a state of anxiety because of where we were before. So has only got used to it and now things will be changing at the end of 2022. Right now though that is up in the air.

February

This was a month of settling down and hoping to follow our dreams to a certain point. We were still in a lockdown so nothing had changed for me as I was again housebound. And  February is the middle of winter it is the time when I go out the least in any case. So in that respect, I barely left the house. It was also a time to start the mental change for the hope of following the dreams we had and recuperating mentally from the stress of the move and Christmas. 

 

March

So this was a month of waiting to find out if we could follow our dreams. So were quite stressed. The kids also were meant to be going back to school because it was deemed best they went back. Rather than homeschooling. But because they are young carers for me, it was decided that one of them should go back earlier due to their mental health. 

The last few months for me nothíng had changed for me with the exception that I was to see the people who help me be a more human person in my eyes as salons were slowly opening up.

April

This was a simple month as it was just a month that was just getting things done while waiting for an answer from the people who held our dreams in their hands. My cp over the last few months had been stable and we just spent time being together and I was writing my posts for this blog and finding that my provider was not as good as I thought it was. But struggled on

Final thoughts

This quarter may sound like the year was just a simple time of living and being while going through the year and life

Wow

This is a positive quote to keep in mind.

Cp Depression and your 40s

You're in your 40s and cp are throwing spanners in the works:

Ok, so you notice things are getting harder and you are more and more frustrated. I get it. I’m going through this stage of life right now and get what you are going through. 

What happened for me to begin with

Life was pretty good to start with. The kids were off to school and I was in control of what was happening around me. Yet I could tell that things were going wrong within me. Not chemically but physically. It was the little things that I was losing control of, such as putting my shoes and socks on or crossing my legs at the knee.

Those Feelings kicked in again!

As I mentioned in previous posts such as The feelings of frustration, and despair because of the way things are with my body I felt that I was losing control of everything around me. This included the feeling of not being a good mum because of the inability of being able to do something that I perceive that the average mum can do. And some of the things that I couldn’t do. Sometimes it is frustrating that the children wouldn’t do the chores that I asked them to do. And they were chores I can’t do anymore. You may say what about asking your partner to help. Yes, I did and do but just sometimes it is the feeling of loss of independence. It can be the realisation that says in 10years time the brain damage that is consistent changes something else that you thought you wouldn’t necessarily lose but lose anyway.

What I did

I did what most mums would do which was to nag the kids to help but this didn’t work. Because as the kids got older they became more and more independent and didn’t want and still don’t as I write this. But I have to realise they are teens right now and don’t want to do anything that their parent wants them to do. And that is normal! 

How I counteract those feelings:

When I first noticed that things were going awry I said to my hubby I thought I needed to go back on medications and so I went back to my doctor and went back on medication. And I’m not sure if I will ever come off them as anything can trigger an episode. And when I have been off them by mistake I acted like a completely wild animal with my anger and frustration. My kids have politely asked me to never come off them.

I also got another case of counselling and in this round, I had CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy). Which I do use almost daily. Because there are things that can trigger an event that causes that to arrive. But that is diminishing slowly.

Final words

So I have said what I used to help myself in my moods in this post and the posts before I mention the different types of ways of getting help for yourself as an adult and to aid children who have cerebral palsy to learn how to deal with their condition as they get older.

But it is up to you how you help yourself or the person you care for.

A strong quote to think

This is seriously an amazing quote to stay positive. It doesn't matter what age or anything you are.

CP and depression in your 30s

So the 30s have hit and you’re feeling low again:

So looking at what you have and the thought of why you. And the feeling of being a burden is another problem because you are not able to do things that the people who you live with can. 

Remember that these are also issues that occurred when you were a child, teen and in your 20s 

Ok, the feeling is there again!

This is when you are going through another bout of depression because of the feelings. But you are not alone. There are lots of people who are in the same box.

What to do?

Ok so the feelings are there and you've been given all the cues to get the help in your 20s. Now is the time to use them again. 

If on the other hand, you're reading this post then it's ok. I've been through the same things and didn't know anything until I was in my 30s 

What I did!

It was at this age I finally started getting the help I needed.

I was diagnosed with clinical depression at this point. So I was put on medication. I also went through a course of counselling. For a long time, I managed to be content enough and came off the medication. 

When my family grew and my children were eventually off to school I noticed that my body has started to get a bit more worn. Slowly I also noticed that I was getting more and more tired. However, I ignored all the warning signs and carried on and let life take over.

In that sense, I should not have left myself got at this point but I did. For some of the stuff I was dealing with I got healing thanks to the counselling but there were things I was dealing with and didn’t know.

If you have those sorts of feelings realise that everyone has these and it doesn’t matter if you have a disability or not.

Last words

My thoughts are if you have not got the help you need then push for it but if you have it then use it. There are so many apps as well that can help you. But not everyone is the same so it is best to search on your phone and try as many as possible till you find the ones that work for you.

Definitely something to think

This is something that everyone can do no matter if you are disabled or not.

Young adults with cerebral Palsy and depression

So they're 20+ with cp:

Ok so now any help that social services and the medical professionals seemingly wash their hands of the new adult who is beginning their adulthood. I say that in the sense that the professionals don't really know what cerebral palsy does to an adult.

So what do you do now?

If you have gone through difficult times as a child with cerebral palsy and they are feeling low because of what the condition is throwing up even daily. This could be tiredness, muscle tone and pain, or anything else that cp has given you. Then go back to the people who were there for you as a teen helped you with the mental health issues that come across from time to time. These may be:

• Councillor

• Friends

• Family

• Work colleagues.

• GP

• Social services 

One of the main feelings:

At this point the question of why me? probably is the biggest question you may ask yourself even though you may know the reason. Emotional frustration because of what your body throws at you emotionally is the main cause of depression. So keep this in check and anything else that causes stress and anxiety.

Will you have a partner?

This is another question that may trigger depression and anxiety. The thing is this is a question that even able-bodied people have to. So it's a normal question for everyone.

The frustration of the cp:

This is a common cause of depression so going to your GP for help is the 1st big step as much as it's the sensation of depression and anxiety because of what cp has given you. But also remember no one is the same. If we were, it would be boring.

The future?

That totally depends on you and how you deal with things.

Think about it

This is something to inspire to daily